What is sapiosexual?
Sex with intelligence: who are sapiosexuals and why relationships with them can be unbearable
Sapiosexuals are people who are attracted not to their partner's appearance, but to his intelligence. The smarter the person, the higher the sapiophile's sexual attraction to him. But psychologists say that one should be careful with "smart guy lovers.
Sheldon's character from The Big Bang Theory is a prime example of a sapiosexual. He is incapable of falling in love at first sight, he cares little about appearance, and empty conversations irritate him. A sapiosexual prefers intellectual philosophical conversation to intimacy.
The psychotherapist notes that sapiosexuality cannot be considered a sexual deviation, because it is not a deviation from the norm, but a form of preference, a fetish. Of course, if a person completely refuses to have sex and chooses only to talk about complex matters - this is a reason to consult a specialist.
Perhaps, as a child, the young man was in love with an excellent girl, with whom it was interesting to communicate, but the relationship did not work out, and the behavioral scenario remained. Or, for example, the girl was in a relationship with a silly young man who forever discouraged gossip, flat jokes and idle chitchat.
Experts say that the lack of interest in appearance does not mean that the man himself or his partner look bad and do not look after themselves. They can be very attractive and well-groomed, but they do not prioritize their appearance.
What are the pros
Relationships with a sapiosexual, firstly, complimentarily emphasize the high IQ of his chosen one, because if the partner is stupid - any connection is out of the question. Secondly, the alliance of intelligent people is usually very strong: they both know what they want, know how to talk and listen.
Intellectually advanced people often have no problems with imagination and fantasy - this is a big plus for intimate life. And with empathy the intelligent are all right, they know how to feel the partner.
In matters of making money there can be two options: either intelligence helps to make good money, or the sapiosexual is so smart that he is not interested in any material things, he knows how to be content with the necessary, without any excesses.
What are the cons
Talking about complicated things is far from always involving heartiness and comfort. It is often difficult to get along with intelligent people, they are intransigent in everyday matters, can be fixated on themselves and their development, allow arrogance and arrogance.
Sapiosexuals, as a rule, are ready to put up with all the shortcomings of their object of adoration in the first phase of the relationship. But when infatuation passes, difficulties begin. One either has to put up with them for the sake of clever speeches, or split up and look for a new genius.
A "smart relationship" needs constant shake-ups, otherwise one can get stuck in continuous conversations that eventually become tedious. The best solution is to have debates and heated arguments on some hot topic. Intellectual fights can fuel such relationships and prolong their life.
Sapiosexuals are very vulnerable. But this applies not so much to their partner's rudeness or impertinence as to their stupidity. If a partner makes a spelling mistake, mix up a quote from some philosopher, or cannot solve a mathematical problem, there will be no interest. There should be no mistakes.
There have always been people who were only attracted to smart people. But the name "sapiosexual" has only recently appeared. There's nothing strange about the fact that a person can't fall in love immediately, and first he studies his partner, comprehends his inner world, and only after that he awakens tender feelings in him. This format is useful for those who are set up for a long and serious relationship. The main thing is that an intellectual must always conform, otherwise why would he need such a partner?